Unintentional Insults

[geezer]

I think this is something that should be brought out in the open, to give me the opportunity to apologize to anyone I may have offended, even if that was not my intent. I was surprised to get this PM. I'm not so surprised now that I have given it some thought:

Hey Ron,

If you want to insult folks, with comments about being a girl, take it

to another forum. We don't take kindly to this sort of childish

behavior.

The statement I made and was percieved as "childish behavior" was not directed at anyone, but used as a reference to myself, jokingly at that. I am certainly not under the impression that everyone is able or willing to change a tire. That's your choice.

I'm just like everyone else that frequents this site, looking for answers to questions I have, helping someone if I can and taking an interest in the cars and projects of others. I have never typed out anything on this site with the intention of being hurtfull or insensitive. If anything has been taken that way I sincerly appologize.

[DeesZ]

Ron, very few people today would do what you have just done. IMHO you have set a good example. It's easy to make comments and considerably more difficult to apologize.

[=Enigma=]

In this day and age of overcharged political correctness, I'm not at all surprised that there was at least one person who could find that innocent statement offensive. And good example or not, I see no reason for you to fall on your sword and make a public apology. Personally, I think someone needs to lighten up a bit. Life to short to sweat the small stuff.

[Zak's Z]

Ya seriously. I read that thread over several times looking for any sign of both insult and childish behavior. None were found. I'd like to joke and say "how dare you sorta make fun of yourself on the internet", but that WOULD be childish and may be offensive to some.

Zak

[Mike]

Who sent you that PM? I don't recall giving anyone authority to act on behalf of the club with that kind of message. Please send me a PM. Thanks.

Also, can you post a link to the thread where this unintentional insult took place?

mg

[hls30.com]

Mike,

Here is the thread

http://www.classiczcars.com/forums/showthread.php?threadid=25585

see post #19

Maybe you'll see what the Pm'er saw and explain it to the rest of us...

On that note, I hope my silliness in titling a couple of threads of late was not offensive to anyone-if so I appologize.

Will

[240Z-Fan]

The problem boils down to interpretation by the reader. With BBS’, email, etc it is easy to misunderstand the writers intent. That is why we add smilies and the sort.

As a writer, we try to be careful to write something that conveys what we mean. As reader, we need to be careful to not react to something that is not there and give the benefit of the doubt to the writer if possible.

I also read the thread in question. Okay, someone could get offended if they choose to see it that way. (I didn't) But, why bother? Life is too short.

Regarding the PM itself: My opinion is that I would rather have the person with the complaint come directly to me (PM or otherwise) than complain to the boss, my coworkers, or my friends.

The irony here is that the PM did the complainer no favors. (My English teachers are rolling in their graves). It did not ask for a clarification, nor was it a polite request to change the language. It was knee-jerk response to an email which rubbed him/her the wrong way.

Let's learn from this:

1) Learn to be careful about what others may read into your writings’.

2) Learn to question your reaction before assuming the worst from a post.

Now let us get back to the Z-Car discussion.

Al

[TomoHawk]

Don't forget that this is an open public forum, and you have potentially 6 billion or so different people from different countries, and different languges, who could disagree with you! If you don't undertstand someone's intent, you need to ask for clarification.

Maybe we could start a poll to see if we have someone from every country on Earth registered here?

But since it's also an open forum, you need to take opinions and comments with a grain of salt.

thx

[sblake01]

since it's also an open forum, you need to take opinions and comments with a grain of salt.

Or a pound. I know my intent when I post but I can't really expect anyone else to know it anymore than I can imagine the possible interpretations by others. I think it's admirable what Ron has done in apologizing but I also think it's a bit over sensitive of the person who pm'd him to react that way on a public forum. 'WE'? That person doesn't speak for me any more that anyone here does. Nor do I speak for anyone else here. Who would want that responsibility?

[jmanz6]

Wow, if they thought that was offensive, they better not post on zcar.com or hybriz.org!! Those guys will leave them in tears.... I still don't see what was so offensive, but it must have struck a nerve. If we had tobe aware of everyones insecurities on the internet while posting, the posts would only have words such as a, and, the, if, or, to, and it.

[Carl Beck]

In this day and age of overcharged political correctness, I'm not at all surprised that there was at least one person who could find that innocent statement offensive. And good example or not, I see no reason for you to fall on your sword and make a public apology. Personally, I think someone needs to lighten up a bit. Life to short to sweat the small stuff.

Hi Enigma:

I initially wrote a far more direct, blunt and course response {that's just the kind of guy I am} .... but after thinking about it... I believe I'll just Second your more thoughtful and polite comments....

FWIW,

Carl B.

[Mike]

Reminds me of a famous quote, "Can't we all just get along?"

Just to let everyone know, if you have a problem with a thread, REPORT IT.