Posted April 14, 200520 yr comment_120519 Most likely these are borrowed from Steven Wright and similar comedians. Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive? Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds? Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii? Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes? Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there? Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime? Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations? How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings? If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors? If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose? If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON®, how do they make TEFLON® stick to the pan? If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen? If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights? You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"? Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM? Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways? Why is brassiere singular and panties plural? Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo? You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance? Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio? I don't believe in reincarnation, but I did in my past life. Link to comment https://www.classiczcars.com/forums/topic/15636-oxymorons-and-contradictions/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
April 14, 200520 yr comment_120521 you got everyone in my work laughing...thanks for the laugh Link to comment https://www.classiczcars.com/forums/topic/15636-oxymorons-and-contradictions/#findComment-120521 Share on other sites More sharing options...
April 14, 200520 yr comment_120537 Why? For all the same reasons politicians do what they do......pure stupidity!!! :sick: Link to comment https://www.classiczcars.com/forums/topic/15636-oxymorons-and-contradictions/#findComment-120537 Share on other sites More sharing options...
April 14, 200520 yr comment_120539 None of them are oxymorons. Link to comment https://www.classiczcars.com/forums/topic/15636-oxymorons-and-contradictions/#findComment-120539 Share on other sites More sharing options...
April 15, 200520 yr Author comment_120566 None of them are oxymorons. Sure there is, the word "oxymoron" is a oxymoron. Oxy=sharp, moron=dull Link to comment https://www.classiczcars.com/forums/topic/15636-oxymorons-and-contradictions/#findComment-120566 Share on other sites More sharing options...
April 15, 200520 yr comment_120573 Sophomore!Will Link to comment https://www.classiczcars.com/forums/topic/15636-oxymorons-and-contradictions/#findComment-120573 Share on other sites More sharing options...
April 15, 200520 yr comment_120636 Gee sounds like somebody i know... Link to comment https://www.classiczcars.com/forums/topic/15636-oxymorons-and-contradictions/#findComment-120636 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Create an account or sign in to comment