THE BEST DRINKING STORY EVER

From the state where drinking and driving is considered a sport, comes a

story from Texas.

Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a local neighborhood

bar. Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so

intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the

parking lot for a few minutes with the officer quietly observing.

After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five different

vehicles, the man managed to find his own car which he fell into. He

was there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar

and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and

off (it was a dry night), flicked the hazard flasher on and off, tooted

the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward

a few inches, reversed a little and then remained stationary for a few

more minutes as more patrons left in their vehicles. At last he pulled

out of the parking lot and

started to drive slowly down the street.

The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started

up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man

over and carried out a breathalyzer test. To his amazement the

breathalyzer indicated no evidence of the man having consumed alcohol at

all! Dumbfounded, the officer said "I'll have to ask you to accompany

me to the Police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken."

"I doubt it," said the man, "tonight I'm the designated decoy."

Damn, this is a GREAT idea!